daisy, let it go.

I don't know.
I'm scared.
Scared that I'm falling too deep, too soon, too fast.

I don't even know why I'm crying anymore.

jue*giving isn't easy.

why another day?

Bold the statements that are true to you.
Italicize the statements that you WISH are true
Leave the fibs alone.

1) I miss somebody right now.
2) I do not watch TV these days.
3) I wear glasses or contact lenses.
4) I love to play video games.
5) I have tried marijuana.
6) I have been in a threesome
7) I believe honesty is the best policy.
8) I have changed mentally over the past year.
9) I curse.
10) I'm like totally smart.
11) I’ve broken someone’s bones.
12) I’m paranoid sometimes.
13) I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
14) I need money right now.
15) I love sushi.
16) I talk really, really fast.
17) I have long hair.
18) I have lost money in Las Vegas.
19) I have at least one sibling.
20) I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
21) I couldn't survive without Caller ID.
22) I like the way I look.
23) I am usually pessimistic.
24) I have a lot of mood swings.
25) I have a hidden talent.
26) I’m always hyper.
27) I have a lot of friends.
28) I have pecked someone of the same sex.
29) I enjoy talking on the phone.
30) I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
31) I love to shop.
32) I enjoy window shopping.
33) I would rather shop than eat.
34) I don’t hate anyone.
35) I’m a pretty good dancer.
36) I’m completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother
37) I have a cell phone.
38) I believe in God.
39) I am an adrenaline junkie.
40) I watch MTV on a daily basis.
41) I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
42) I’ve rejected someone before.
43) I want to have children in the future.
44) I have changed a diaper before.
45) I’ve called the cops on a friend before.
46) I’m not allergic to anything.
47) I have a lot to learn.
48) I’m shy around members of the opposite sex.
49) I have made a move on a friends’ significant other or crush in the past.
50) I have tried alcohol before.
51) I own the South Park movie.
52) I would die for my best friend.
53) I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.
54) I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
55) I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
56) Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
57) I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it.
58) I am happy at this moment.
59) I’m obsessed with girls/guys.
60) I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I’ve ever met.
61) I study for tests most of the time.
62) I am comfortable with who I am right now.
63) I have more than just my ears pierced.
64) I walk barefoot wherever I can.
65) I have jumped off a bridge.
66) I love sea turtles.
67) I spend ridiculous money on makeup.
68) I plan on achieving a major goal & dream.
69) I’m proficient in a musical instrument.
70) I hate office jobs.
71) I love sci-fi movies.
72) I think water rules.
73) I went college out of state.
74) I like sausages.
75) I love kisses.
76) I fall for the worst people.
77) I adore bright colours.
78) I can’t live without black eyeliner.
79) I don’t know why the hell I just did this stupid thing.
80) I usually like covers better than originals.
81) I can pick up things with my toes.
82) I can whistle.
83) I can move my tongue in waves, much like a snake’s slither.
84) I have ridden/owned a horse.
85) I still have every journal I’ve written in.
86) I can’t stick to a diet.
87) I talk in my sleep.
88) I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
89) I have jazz in my blood.
90) Climbing trees is a brilliant past-time.
91) I wear a toe ring.
92) I can’t stand at LEAST one person that I work go to school with.
93) I am a caffeine junkie.
94) I cosplay or know what cosplay or cosaplying means.
95) I have been to over 15 conventions.
96) I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical the better.
97) I’m an artist.
98) I only clean my room when necessary.
99) I like a person of the same sex.
100) I love being happy.

jue*you're every minute of my everyday.

you're the ultimate you.

I've never been related to someone who has passed away because of cancer, so I can't say I know how you feel. But I do know that the last thing you want to hear would be someone asking you to move on and let it go.

So I guess the most appropriate thing I can say is,

To my darling junior and friend, times will be rough, but things will get better eventually. I've known you for years now and I know despite all this, you'll be able to stay strong. Your brothers need you right now, so stay strong for them.

And to you who doesn't read my blog, I hope somehow you know that my prayers are with you. I believe that those who leave us at such a young age were here for a certain purpose, and now that she's been relieved of all pain, I'm sure that whatever she was meant to do has been done.

My condolences are with both your families. May both of them rest in peace.

jue*my heart's gonna find you.

Is it just me or this past week has just been about people leaving due to cancer? It could be sheer coincidence but it either way, it's freaking me out. Not to mention that Jon's one year anniversary would be in less than two weeks time. I don't know. I was just thinking about it.

of sand, sun and beach.

Maybe it's the fact that I've been awake for a good couple of hours with nothing better to do but think.

Maybe it's the fact that my phone hasn't been ringing and the only messages I've got so far did nothing to brighten my morning.

Maybe it's the fact that we're all beginning to lose touch with each other even though high school isn't over.

Maybe it's the fact that I don't want to move on, I don't want to get out of my comfort zone, I don't want to leave the memories behind.

Maybe it's the fact that reality is slowly swallowing me whole and as much as I try to swim up to the surface, all I'm doing is drowning even deeper.

Maybe it's the fact that I just miss those four solid days spent with the people I cherish the most doing nothing but enjoying each other's company.

Okay, I'm finally admitting it.

Despite all the crap that happened there,

I really do miss Rompin.

jue*you're my get away car.

i'm bringing sexy back.

I tried typing out a post on the incident that happened in school today involving me, my orange top and a silly junior that needs to learn some respect.

I even wanted to tell her off in school today but I think I proved my own presumption that I'm not a very angry person. Sure, I can be bitchy (at times) but even as that stupid no brain girl Form 1 kid stood that yelling at me like she's the boss of me, I didn't so much as budge. My friends on the other hand took the opportunity to put her right back at her place, but my anger level didn't so much as increase by a notch.

Like seriously, I didn't even scream at her.

And I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing.

Oh well. Let's just hope I don't bump into her in school (that's if I can recognize such an idiotic face) cause strings of sentences have been forming in my head and I really wish I could tell her off.

Hopefully, any junior that happens to stumble upon this page would take note that even though I don't approve of the whole SeniorJunior (no, I don't mean the band) segregation, a little respect won't do you any harm especially considering that we've been in the school much longer compared to your short seven months here. I know respect may be a foreign word to you as it can be seen by your spoilt behaviour in school, but it really is never too late to learn.

Or maybe I shouldn't waste my time over things like this. Maybe I shouldn't even bother. I don't know.

I miss Cina Boyy.

jue*let it go, let it all go.